By Malynn Kuangparichat, Psy.D., J.D.
In the workplace, perfectionists have many positive qualities on the surface. For instance, they’re detail-oriented, high achieving, and hard workers. Though these are great qualities for professionals working in or leading a team, when we look under the surface, perfectionists may actually struggle with perfectionism and mental health issues like anxiety, depression, and stress.
Taking a closer look, recovering perfectionists deal with being highly critical of their abilities and their teammates’ quality of work, and struggle with low self-esteem. Internally, they’re working from a place of fear – afraid of making mistakes, failing at tasks, and not being enough.
Of course, setting standards, striving to do their best, and having the motivation to work hard is a normal and worthy endeavor. But perfectionism takes it a step further and becomes a mentality where perfection is the only acceptable outcome.
So there’s a difference between reaching for success and reaching for perfection.
For one thing, reaching perfection is an unattainable task because we are all human and, thus, we all make mistakes.
In this blog post, I’ll show you how to work from your strengths without falling into the harmful effects of perfectionism.
Are You Struggling With Overcoming Perfectionism At Work?
So, how do you know if you’re struggling with overcoming perfectionism at work?
Most commonly, you find yourself procrastinating on tasks for a project, and having difficulty meeting deadlines due to procrastination. It’s challenging for you to delegate work because you’ve set high standards from your teammates but you know they won’t deliver to the standard you’ve set.
On the other hand, you’re absolutely committed to your work, and you want the best for your company. That means you take great care with the quality of your work no matter the size and importance of the task at hand. What’s more, your focus and determination are important qualities for the benefit of your workplace.
But you have a hard time accepting constructive feedback because you believe you’ve failed at the task and it’s just another affirmation that you’re not good enough.
Also, if you’re able to delegate a task, you tend to micromanage the team. Thus, these
perfectionist tendencies can negatively affect your team’s morale and effectiveness as a team.
As mentioned above, perfectionism can cause a number of mental health issues including depression, general anxiety, eating disorders, obsessive-compulsive disorder, and extreme stress.
Many of our clients come to us feeling the worst of themselves, but please take it to heart that you’re starting from the right place, right here, right now.
Tendencies for perfectionism is something that builds over time, generally starting at an early age. And our culture plays a role in cultivating perfectionist tendencies for our students with increasing academic pressures, high-stake testing, and prioritizing work over our well-being.
Not surprisingly, these pressures that start in our days as students transfer over to adulthood and the workplace.
7 Effective Strategies For Overcoming Perfectionism At Work
You can develop skills and habits that help you overcome perfectionism at work, and help you practice self-compassion.
Not only that, but you’ll also decrease anxiety, stress, and other mental health issues caused by perfectionism while boosting confidence, self-esteem, and overall well-being.
Check out these 7 strategies that will help you optimize your time and efforts in the workplace while letting your strengths shine without the procrastination, defensiveness, or the need to do all the work yourself.
#1 Bring Awareness
The first step is to bring awareness to behaviors and tendencies that play into perfectionism. Start by elevating your awareness at work and notice when you’re procrastinating, checking and rechecking work over and over again, or micromanaging tasks and teammates.
Don’t be harsh on yourself. Remember, noticing these things doesn’t mean you’re failing. Non-judgmentally noticing and getting curious when these behaviors surface is a first positive step to overcoming perfectionism that’s doing more harm than helping.
#2 Reframe Your Thoughts
Reframing your thoughts turns self-criticism from negative self-talk into positive self-affirmations. Just like bringing awareness to perfectionist behaviors, you can notice what you’re saying internally to yourself. Don’t be hard on yourself when you notice negative self-talk.
These thoughts originated from past situations that, at one point, helped protect you in the moment. But now these thoughts are no longer serving you, so you can gently acknowledge the negative self-talk and flip it into a positive self-affirmation. The more that you practice this, the more automatic and easy it will become.
Here are a few examples of reframing a negative thought into a positive one in the workplace:
Example #1:
Negative self-talk: “This is just not going to work”
Positive self-talk: “I can try to make it work. What do I need to focus on to make this work?”
Example #2:
Negative self-talk: “I can’t present this project. It’s just not ready.”
Positive self-talk: “It’s better to move forward than to stall out indefinitely.”
Example #3:
Negative self-talk: “Eh, this work is okay, I guess.”
Positive self-talk: “I’m satisfied that I tried my best and that is more than enough.”
For every individual, the flip to positive self-talk will look and sound a little different. It’s helpful to work these out with an expert therapist who can help you dig further into creating mindset shifts that empower and free you to be your best self in a healthy way.
#3 Develop a Growth Mindset
Another helpful strategy to overcome perfectionist tendencies is consistently catching moments, in a neutral manner, when you’re navigating from a fixed mindset vs a growth mindset. Growth mindset, pioneered by psychologist Carol Dweck (PhD), is the idea that our thoughts, both conscious and unconscious, affect us and the way we word a situation can either keep us stuck or move us powerfully forward.
Particularly for perfectionists, making mistakes is a key area for perfectionists to develop a growth mindset around.
Instead of thinking of mistakes as failures and feeling defeated, reframe mistakes as opportunities for learning.
This also includes receiving constructive feedback from a teammate or supervisor at work. Instead of thinking within a fixed mindset, such as “I’m so dumb” or “There’s something wrong with me,” reframe to develop your growth mindset and think “I AM smart and I can learn” or “There’s nothing wrong with me. Everyone is unique. Everyone has potential, including me.”
Your fixed mindset as a perfectionist is coming from a place of wanting to earn external approval, as explained by Brené Brown in The Gifts of Imperfection. As she succinctly puts it, “Healthy striving is self-focused. Perfectionism is other-focused.”
Essentially, you’re perceiving yourself through your accomplishments from external sources, looking for approval from others. Whereas, in a growth mindset, when you make a mistake or receive constructive feedback at work, you can see it as a learning opportunity to grow from an internal motivation.
Ultimately, developing a growth mindset will increase confidence, self-compassion, and resiliency while decreasing fear, shame, and anxiety.
And, remember, shifting mindsets doesn’t happen overnight, but happens over time. Be kind to yourself and take a look at how you can adopt a growth mindset in different areas of your life so you can handle daily pressures with confidence.
#4 Focus on the Process vs. Result
As mentioned before, there’s a difference between reaching for success and reaching for perfection. When you focus on the journey itself rather than the end result, you can see all the growth and learning. The process is where we can build resiliency and learn from mistakes. There’s success and meaning-making in the trying!
This goes hand-in-hand when you manage a team. It’s not about controlling each team member so you can control the end result. Rather, focus on the team process to cultivate positive morale which in turn helps each teammate function from their best self.
Just like any epic story like Frodo’s journey with the ring, the process is where he discovered his inner strength, fortitude, and resilience. For yourself, you can shift your attention from the end result to the process, emphasizing and praising your efforts instead of focusing on the achievement.
#5 Set Realistic Goals
As a perfectionist, your goal is usually achieving that “all or nothing” status that sets you as the best. Your goals are, for the most part, unattainable because perfection is a myth. This is why you may end up procrastinating or unable to meet work deadlines because you’re continually checking and rechecking your work.
Setting realistic goals means setting them not extrinsically, such as how you want to look in the eyes of others, but intrinsically aligned with your core values. It also means setting smaller goals over a longer timeline, and keeping things flexible as you progress along your project timeline.
Set the expectation that you’ll make mistakes along the way because that’s how you learn and grow. As I mentioned above, it’s much more about the process than the result.
#6 Find a Role in Your Job That Lends to Your Strengths
As someone who is detail-oriented, find a role in your job that plays to your strengths. You may consider a role that offers projects with focused priorities and require more attention to details. Also, consider working with a teammate who is less detail-oriented so you balance each other out and keep tasks moving forward.
#7 Practice Self-Compassion
All of these strategies are most effective when you’re practicing self-compassion which encompasses self-kindness, mindfulness, and common humanity. There are self-compassion exercises that can help increase your emotional resilience, construct a more accurate self-concept, and develop more caring relationship behavior (including with yourself!). You can learn more about 3 ways to practice self-compassion in my blog post here.
You Don’t Need to Do This Alone
Please know that you don’t need to do this alone. We understand that seeking professional support can feel scary, and we’re here for you every step of the way so you can feel empowered in your well-being at work. Our high quality therapy sessions are specialized to expertly guide you through overcoming perfectionism by helping you set personalized goals, bring forth your strengths, and develop customized strategies.
Contact Us
Here at CCWB, we value our clients and acknowledge the courage it takes to seek professional mental health support.
Chester County Well-Being (CCWB) provides a range of mental health services to ensure we meet our community’s needs. We serve individuals, couples, and families in the Chester County area. Reach out to us here.
Our specializations include:
- Work and Career issues
- Stress Management
- Therapy for Depression and Anxiety
- Conflict Resolution
- Couples Counseling
- Family Counseling
- Parenting Support
- Grief Counseling
- Addiction & Recovery
Teletherapy
All our clinicians provide safe and secure teletherapy sessions to anyone residing in PA. Additionally, we provide telehealth options for residents of other states, depending on the clinician. Simply head to our About Us page, and click each clinician’s “read more” tab for telehealth details.
Telepsychology services are provided by Dr. Kuangparichat and Dr. Stern to clients who reside in a state that participates in PSYPACT. Find out if your state is on the list of participating states HERE.
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About the Author
Malynn Kuangparichat (Psy.D., J.D.) is founder and psychologist at Chester County Well-Being.
She has a collaborative approach that results in highly tailored evaluations intended to meet her clients’ unique needs. She focuses on an individual’s strengths, which are integrated in the practical, personalized recommendations identified by the findings of an evaluation.
In her free time, she enjoys running, spending time with family and friends, and getting ice cream or doughnuts from the local shops.